A Mirror Image

My second graders were very excited about a new bulletin board they were going to help me create.

As a correlation to our reading story on growing and changing, each student was to bring a baby picture to class to be displayed on the board. I carefully explained that the pictures were to be kept private so we could guess which classmate matched with each baby picture. I also discussed that bringing a younger picture would make the guess more difficult than bringing in an older picture.

The toddler picture, I explained, would be more easily identifiable. The next morning, one of my shy boys came to my desk and secretly slid a picture into my hands. The picture was of himself at about six months old. He said, "Mrs. Cassidy, I'm very sorry to tell you this,but I really have always pretty much looked like myself."

"Well thank goodness for that!" was all I could say.

Christine Cassidy
Lafayette, Louisiana

A couple of years ago my daughter, then age 11, heard me discuss different learning styles. I carefully explained about visual, auditory, and tactile learners.

A few days later, she came up to me excitedly and said, "Hey, Mom, I can learn by all three learning methods!" I asked which three she was thinking of, and she answered, "Auditory, visual and mandatory."

Susan Hennies
Davis, California

A few years back the mayor of our town was invited to come to our school and speak to the second graders about his job. He explained some of his duties, going to town meetings, making important decisions about town events, creating town laws, and also that he could marry people. He said that he might marry five or ten people each year.

During the question-and-answer period after he spoke, one little boy asked, "How do you have time to spend with all of your families if you're married to so many people?"

Sue Mayer
Vernon, New Jersey

On the first day of school in our town, kindergarten parents get to ride on the bus with their child. While the child goes to the classroom to meet his/her new teacher and classmates, the parents gather in the cafeteria for a social/ informational time with staff and other parents.

My granddaughter, Kaitie, proudly and rather confidently kissed her mom and dad goodbye, but before heading down the corridor to her classroom, she asked, "Will you be waiting for me in the 'bacteria'?"

Margery Mars
North Monmouth, Maine

Sixth graders do such goofy things. While students were taking turns reading a story out loud in class, I noticed a student in the back of the room not paying any attention. He was sitting sideways in his desk with his right ankle propped up on his left knee. He was wearing athletic socks and was engrossed in unraveling the elastic in his sock.

Not only was he unraveling the elastic, he was wrapping it around his head and back around his foot until he was caught in a spider web of elastic.

Eventually, other students started noticing although no one said a word. When "our spider" finally broke his concentration, he turned his entangled head to a classroom of grinning faces.

Claire Gammon
Cedartown, GA

Students in my high school geometry class often complain that there are so many theorems, formulas, and properties to learn that it taxes their memory.

To ease the way for them as well as to liven things up in the classroom, I use a lot of mnemonic devices. One day even the most reluctant learners perked up when I said "Today we are going to learn about SIN and SEX."

I admit that the excitement died down a bit when I elaborated … "Yes, the Sum of the INterior angles and the Sum of the EXterior angles of a polygon!"

Arlene Yolles
Westport, Connecticut

A colleague who teaches kindergarten was doing end-of-the year testing with her students. "Remember to keep your eyes on your own papers," she reminded her class. "Please don't look at your neighbor's work."

One 6-year-old raised his hand and said, "But Mrs. Smith, none of my neighbors are even in this class."

Karen Williams
Mesa, Arizona

I was in a preschool classroom at Rock River School to help with a minor problem.

Waiting for a child to settle down, I was observing three coloring shapes. I asked a little boy what color was the circle and he proudly responded, "green."

I asked a little girl what color was the square and she correctly told me "red." I asked the third child what color was the box and she knew right away and said "blue."

Just then I felt this little tap on my shoulder and I turned to see a little boy with this very worried expression on his face.

He said to me, "Gee mister, you sure don't know your colors very well, do you?"

John Southard,
Rockford, Illinois

Can I Quote You?

Every week in my fourth grade class we have a Word of the Week and a Quote of the Week. If the author of the quote is unknown we say the quote is by anonymous.

One day a student said aloud, "That anonymous sure did say a lot of good things."

Laura Drake
Carney, Oklahoma

I usually have a soda each day. One of my first graders came up to me and told me, "Miss Ebersole, if you keep drinking pop then your teeth are going to turn soggy."

I just laughed and asked, "soggy, are you sure?" He thought about it for a brief second then changed his answer, "I mean they will rust."

Kimberly Ebersole
Wichita, Kansas

Timmy was "wool-gathering," so I snapped him to attention by addressing him, "Hey, Kiddo!" The next time I called on him, I said, "Tim …" He replied cleverly, "I think I want to be Kiddo."

Max Harless
High Point, North Carolina

I teach first grade and one day I asked a student who'd been absent if he'd been sick.

He told me, "No, I wasn't sick. My mommy couldn't find her purse, and then when she found it, she didn't have time to put on her eyelashes, so I had to stay home." I think this tops all the excuses I've heard in my career.

Mary Jane Fizer
Woodbridge, Virginia

I was teaching the children how to draw portraits by having each child draw the face of a clown. I explained that we have to draw the real person's eyes first and then add the clown makeup. One little boy raised his hand and asked, ``Aren't clowns born that way?"

Linda Wanke
Weston, Florida

I was in a preschool classroom at Rock River School to help with a minor problem. Waiting for a child to settle down, I was observing three coloring shapes. I asked a little boy what color was the circle and he proudly responded, "green". I asked a little girl what color was the square and she correctly told me "red". I asked the third child what color was the box and she knew right away and said "blue". Just then there was a tap on my shoulder and I turned to see a little boy with a very worried expression on his face. He sad to me, "Gee mister you sure don't know your colors very well, do you?"

John S. Southard, MSW
School Social Worker
Rockford, IL

After 31 years of teaching, I've had numerous funny moments in my classroom. The very best of these moments occurred in my second year when one of my colleagues who taught social studies came in to see me. She told me that her class had been studying influences on the Declaration of Independence. She had asked the class if anyone knew who John Locke was. One of her students who had not participated in any class discussion all year immediately raised his hand almost falling off his chair. Naturally she called on him and asked him to tell the class about John Locke. He said, "Yeah, I know who he is! He teaches drafting down the hall."

John A. Locke
Pittsfield, Massachusetts

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