It was a tough job, but we’ve selected our favorite homework excuses from the numerous ones sent in by NEA members. Now it’s your turn to vote for your favorites, by rating the ones below.
Grand Opening
"I wasn't able to do my homework last night because we had to go to the Grand Opening of the Bass Pro Shop." Four students gave me this same excuse ... you've got to love it!
— Michelle Bennett, Shallotte, North Carolina
The Sticky Tangram
The homework was to create a certain figure with paper tangrams, glue it down, and return it in the morning. The next day a child sheepishly tells me he can't turn in his work and hands me two pieces of lined paper glued together. I was stumped and then he began to explain he had a slight problem with the glue. When the glued pieces of paper were held up to the light, the tangrams were glued inside. I never laughed so hard in my life. That was 15 years ago and I still have it.
— Patricia Meyer, Albuquerque, New Mexico
The Puppy Ate It
The best one I heard was when one of our math teachers told the students her dog ate their homework. It was true. She had gotten a new puppy, and when she took their homework home to grade it, the puppy ate it! The class got a "freebie" on that homework assignment.
— Becky B., San Diego, California
The Baby Ate It
The best homework excuse was not one I received but one I had to write when my oldest son was in high school. My youngest child was just learning to pull himself up on things. My son left his homework sitting on the couch. Thus the excuse, "My baby brother ate my homework" was born.
— Anne Bremer, San Bernardino, California
When Parakeets Attack
I kept getting homework from a kid that always had holes in it. It looked like someone would take a pencil and just keep stabbing the papers. The poor kid brought his holiday homework packet back to school from winter break in a ziploc bag with a note attached to it. It looked like it had been bitten by a shark with a huge chunk taken out of it. The note read:
“Dear Ms. K: please excuse the appearance of Shawn's homework packet. We have adopted a family of parakeets and they seem to love paper. They have been attacking the homework of all our children. Thank you for accepting his holy homework.”
To top it off, as Shawn was taking off his sweatshirt to hang in the locker, blue and yellow feathers flew out of the shirt above his head and floated to the ground. Too funny!
— Kristie Karlowicz, Cleveland, Ohio
All Packed Up
"We are moving and my mom packed it in a box and we can not find it." Since this responsible young lady is reliable I gave her a break. I had a good laugh when mom called later in the day to confirm the story. She actually brought it to school the next week after unpacking from the move.
— Alicia Jacobson, Haiku, Hawaii
Birth Trumps Homework
My kindergartner brought in a note from his mother:
"I'm sorry _____ doesn't have his homework, I was giving birth and couldn't help him.
It will be done later this week and turned in."
— Tih Penfil, Madison Heights, Michigan
The MVP is not Excused
“Our hockey team just won the State Championships for the second year and I am the MVP...doesn't that give me a break on homework?”
As you can imagine, not only did it not give him a break, but he received points taken off for lateness.
— Ann Johnston, Brighton, Colorado
No Roman Numerals
The best homework excuse I've ever heard was back in the day when we had students typing outlines for their research papers. One young man explained that he didn't have the task completed because his "typewriter didn't come with Roman numerals on it."
My son, now a second grader, also wanted to give up reading homework for Lent. To add to his creativity, he attended a private Catholic school at the time.
10/07/09 - Jacqueline
This homework excuse came from the parent. The mom stated,"The homework is too hard and I am not going to make my son do it." I teach second grade.
10/03/09 - Middle School Teacher
The lamest excuse I ever got for not turning in homework was, "I gave up homework for lent."
09/29/09 - Susan...Cumberland, RI
One of my fourth graders told me, "I had a cold over the weekend and I was sneezing alot. I didn't want you to get sick if I sneezed on my homework, so I didn't do it."
09/29/09 - English Geek
My personal favorite: My books were in my friend's car when he got arrested. The best part was that it was totally true.
AKA, did you comment on the right post? Your comment really has nothing to do with the topic?
09/29/09 - E Wills, Gettysburg, PA
When I was teaching sixth grade I truly had the old "dog ate it" excuse. Mom sent it to school in a baggie with her own note attached. The homework was all in pieces inside the baggie complete with bite marks. It was one of the best laughs, and the entire class enjoyed it.
09/28/09 - Stephanie
From a very responsible student I received her homework in a plastic bag. She was so afraid of getting a zero, she brought the homework after her kitten had urinated on it. With today's technology, she could have just taken a picture of it and I would have mercy on her!
09/27/09 - Ms. Arias
The best is from:
Robin Fisher-Terry
09/27/09 - Grade1_rm12
I thought I was one of the only teachers who had students who state their parent forgot to do the homework. I teach first grade and get that excuse a lot. The funy thing is, when it does arrive I can tell an adult did it. It's amazing to see that parents think all they have to do is write quickly and sloppy and think that the teacher will believe their child completed the homework.
09/27/09 - T. Esper
"My Father Ate My Homework"
It was true: Larry had to create a project to go with his holiday research. He chose an egg dish for his Mexican holiday. When Dad came home from the late shift, he was pleased that the family left him a dish to eat. Larry had to come to school later, after remaking the recipe. The note was a keeper, and the school secretary got a hoot out of it.
09/26/09 - GOOD
I THOUGHT THEY WERE GOOD
09/26/09 - Tammy
One student told me that they had to take the mom to the hospital last night because she wasn't feeling good.The child said, "The doctor said she is pregnant but mom says she isn't. We took mom home."
09/26/09 - AKA
Reinforcement work does have its place, and as much as possible should be done in the classroom with a teacher. I have taught or tutored elementary students to adults in college level pre-calc. classes. I have seen that it is much more effective for a student to have fewer problems, but be required to explain their process and logic behind their steps. If a student is able to explain a concept while working through 5 meaningful problems, if is worth far more than completing 25.
Also as teachers, we don't "cover material", we "teach" our students how to think and work logically. Our teaching is a craft, and I have personally seen that demonstration, investigation, and summation go a long way for children and adults.
09/26/09 - Mrs. Brady
My favorite is "When we were coming back from our weekend trip, the car broke down and burned up with my backpack in it." After talking to the mother, I found out that the student actually had left his backpack at the other end of the trip-- and it was being mailed to his house.
09/26/09 - JM
A few of my favorites (I'm a math guy, by the way): I have a solar powered calculator and it was cloudy. I took time out to snack on a doughnut and a cup of coffee and spent the rest of the night trying to figure out which one to dunk. And the classic, with a twist, I locked the paper in my trunk but a four-dimensional dog got in and ate it.
09/25/09 - Victor Tellez, Compton
A kindergarten student actually told me once, I'm sorry I don't have my homework. We went swimming at my aunt's house and I forgot my backpack there.
In another ocassion, another kindergarten student also told me, I'm sorry my homework isn't here. My mother forgot to do it for me yesterday.
09/25/09 - Karen
In math. especially, homework is a good reinforcer, HOWEVER, if your student does not get it after 10 problems, why on earth would you give them 25? Homework has its place. HOMEWORK should not take HOURS for a student WITH parental help! Too often friends of mine call to ask me why their 6th grader starts homework immediately after school, breaks for dinner and is doing it until bedtime, (9-10. When I question my friends, the most common response I get is, he/she has 25 math problems, 20 spelling words, a language arts worksheet, vocabulary from Science and Social Studies...Need I continue? Elementary grades are particulary bad! I got the best advice, NOT from MARZANO or any of the "amazing" education gurus of today, but from my priest. This was 15 years BEFORE I started teaching, his words, "if it can't be gotten across in 10 - 15 min, you have lost your audience anyway! Keep your "sermon" to 10 to 15 min in those 50 - 60 min classes(which I also teach, so Ido understand)and allow your students time to practice while they have the one person available to help them who knows exactly what the teacher expects. :) Bless all of you! Regardless, we have a certain insanity that makes us love this! Keep loving it! You might be teaching the next Nobel Prize winner or President!
09/25/09 - Michel Plemmons
I've actually told my students that I'm going to have to be very alert to make sure my dog doesn't eat their homework - we all laughed, but it's nice to see someone else who's discovered the same ironic puppy problem!
09/25/09 - MPS
I feel teachers need to ask themselves, "would I want to do this and is it meaningful?" Also, if you don't want to work on a weekend or holiday, neither should your students.
09/25/09 - MG
I agree with those teachers who feel that there should be little or no homework. With our fast moving lifestyles, families need time to spend together. Also, extracurricular activites are more interesting that school work. So, don't load down the students with homework that they probably do even do own their own.
09/25/09 - PCH
adh thinks a teacher should be able to teach material in class. I certainly agree that it can be presented in 6-8 hours, but did the student learn it? If I hears it, I know it exists, if I see it, I know more, if I do it, I understand it. Thus: homework.
09/25/09 - napemberton@aol.com
I taught special ed. for 35 years in Ohio and the best one I have heard is "our cleaning lady threw it out by mistake." Later I mention this to mom at a conference and she says "what cleaning lady ?" we've never had one !!!
09/25/09 - Penny
One day a social studies teacher in our school came to my room to give me "heads up" about a student who would come to my class quite upset. In social studies they had been introduced to drug sniffing dogs, and the police officer had asked for a volunteer to put a bag of drugs in a binder. This girl had volunteered, and then the dog was brought into the room. The dog sniffed out her binder, dug into it, and found the bag of drugs--but in the process, the dog shredded several pieces of paper, including the one the girl was going to hand in to me. When she came to my class and told me that "the dog ate her homework," expecting me not to believe her, I was prepared to say that I totally understood!
09/25/09 - Free
Instead of homework, you could just give a mini-quiz on the previous day's lesson. A "practice" page could be given (and graded beforehand) for preparation. However, I give homework "daily." It's hard to limit homework to 5 or 10 problems in an Algebra class, though unless we're talking SERIOUS word problems! So, 20 - 25 MEANINGFUL problems per night does it for me. Then, we grade and 2 - 3 times a week, I give a homework quiz. It helps me REALLY gauge where my students are BEFORE a chapter or unit test.
09/25/09 - Tess
I agree with Mrs. Fischer's comment on homework. Having a 53 minute period in high school to teach algebra, geometry, algebra 2, statistics is not enough time to reinforce the material taught that day. Processing information, using it in applications, teaming with other students, getting through the required curriculum to be successful for the course to follow requires more time, thus, homework. For those who consider homework not necessary, please consider the subject mattercommthat is being addressed, the time in class that is available before such a statement is made. Thank you.
09/25/09 - jw
Check out Marzano's position on meaningful homework.
09/25/09 - Cory
The parakeet one is true. I had parakeets all throughout my school years and they LOVE paper. I never let mine get a hold of it for too long but they could take some serious chunks out quickly. I remember they really liked paper that bills were printed on. My paretns mailed many a bill with perforations in it.
09/25/09 - KB
On the note of whether or not to give homework--I think it has its place. With the amount of standards we need to cover in such a short time, sometimes it is necessary for kids to take things home to finish what they couldn't during given class time. Homework should not be given just to give homework though, and should be limited.
Who wants to do all that extra grading, anyway?
09/25/09 - adh
I've been teaching for 22 years, and I agree with no or very little homework. If you can't teach these poor kids in the 6-8 hours a day you have them, maybe you're in the wrong career.
09/25/09 - Andrew Jaussi
As a teacher, I have always allowed for the "dog ate my homework" excuse. It came about when my son left his school work on the floor one day and before I could move to get it, his dog pounced and it and tore it to shreds along with his text book. The next day in class I told my students that the only excuse I would accept from now on is "my dog ate my homework". However, they must bring in the pieces because dogs leave very precise bite marks. So, teachers, if a student says that the dog ate his homework, make them prove it.
09/25/09 - gls
I agree with no homework after school. I have other issues I would like to spend that time educating my child with; school work has it's place, but let's make it real. My daughter is an A student because of who she is; but is having trouble in a class because the teacher is monotone and boring, I told her that maybe she could draw a picture while taking notes of what the subject matter is about (geography), tie that into some of the DS games she plays (scenery), etc. It will help her remember the definitions of all those geographical terms and make it more fun. She will probably never look at a DS game the same way again.
09/25/09 - wheresthelove
GJF is obviously a hard*ss--I don't call people morons as (s)he does, but have many choice words in my head. I'll bet dimes against dollars she is despised by everyone in her school and still believes she is correct. It's obvious you don't "teach." If I had less drill and kill and more real world applications and explanations, I'd have learned math--and everything else--better.
Thanks for contributing to our 50% drop out rate!
09/25/09 - CHQ
I resent your name calling and insulting manner. I worry for kids who would have a teacher with such an attitude. Where are the editors? Why would you let GJF's comment through?
09/25/09 - SpEd
Although I never seem to get it back, my parents are always asking for it. If/When they bring it back I give bonus points (that way I don't have to grade it completely:) and everyone is satisfied!
09/25/09 - Mrs. Fischer
HW versus no HW, that is the question.
I did my Master’s Thesis on a specific HW strategy, but I discovered a LOT of research on HW.
1. There is no correlation between achievement and HW in elementary school kids.
2. There is a significant coloration between HW and achievement in middle school and high school kids.
3. If students have the habit of bringing HW home and back to school early, they will be more successful in middle and high school when it counts.
Bottom Line: Elementary school kids should have easy quick fun HW. Middle school and High School kids need rigor and consistency to compete in today’s global marketplace.
HARD WORK and TIME ON TASK separates the “haves” from the “have-nots”.
09/24/09 - MS J
maligned
09/24/09 - Showandah
I discovered very early in my teaching career that homework does one thing very well - it separates the haves from the have-nots. I plan homework time into my classes so everybody has access to the same tools, and the same time.
09/24/09 - Ms. J
I had a student tell me he didn't have his homework because it was in his mother's room. When I asked what that had to do with anything, he replied that when he knocked on her door, she said she had company and he couldn't come in and get it.
09/24/09 - Lori Fowler
I am a big advocate for no homework. I have 2 boys and when they get home they want to run and play. I feel the school has had my child for 6+ hours. When they come home I am very capable of finding activities that educate them also. My next college thesis is let kids be kids. Ditch the homework.
09/24/09 - pbon
I love the parakeet excuse. I actually had a student return one of my personal books with damages caused from his bird. It looked like someone had taken a hole punch to the corner of the book. I thought it was the most original excuse I had ever heard. The mother confirmed the damage and offered to replace the book. With a little TLC, we were able to repair the book. So, this one is true!
09/24/09 - lauren o
I had a student give an excuse that he didn't have his homework because it had fallen in the pool and then the jets tore the paper into tons of tiny pieces.
09/24/09 - L
I had a student last year that never did his homework on Wednesday. When I asked him why he responded by saying that his mother made him go to her salsa lessons with her. When I spoke to his mother she said "yes, he does go with me but the lessons are on Saturday"
09/24/09 - GJF
No homework? What kind of morons are some of you? Homework does several things. It builds a good work ethic (do your homework and then you can play). I don't know about the rest of you, but lack of memory is a major problem for many of my students; homework helps make knowledge "stick". I teach algebra 1, it's a lot of material for a year, without homework, the average student would never remember over the long term what they need to learn from algebra 1. Or am I wrong and we should just all hold hands and sing Kum Ba Ya?
09/24/09 - Tom Z
This c.johnston is a TEACHER? Where did he/she go to school?
09/24/09 - Anonymous
I agree that we all need to be taking a look at the case against homework. I also agree with the mother who said homework was an intrusion on family time. Most professions are hourly or based upon the work getting done anywhere, and not upon completing an arbitray number of "asignments" at home. Homework is not training for a productive and meaningful life, but it does seem to provide a great deal of entertainment for teachers and some parents. I post anonymously because my fellow teachers would burn me as a witch for saying this.
09/24/09 - Denise
A student who usually had cleanliness issues claimed he didn't do his homework the night before because he had to take a bath. No one argued!
09/24/09 - Jo Lavender
My all-time favorite excuse is "the homework (2nd grade, mind you) is too hard for my mother/father to do." I have heard that excuse more times in my SBCUSD career than I care to admit...and the sad part is, that it is true. The homework IS too hard for the mother/father to do.
09/24/09 - Carrie
My students had to make cell models last year. One of my students had used candy and dried spaghetti for part of his model. He left it out overnight and well his dog really did eat his homework. He brought it in the next day and it was all chewed up and the candy was all slobbered on... I laughed and gave him some time to re-make his model.
09/24/09 - safrits
I was grading tests in the teachers lounge when I was a student teacher. I finished up and on the way back to the classroom decided to go to the rest room. I put the tests on the back of the tank while i took care of my business. When I got up they all went in.
09/24/09 - hbilski
How about this: one of my students actually said he wasn't allowed to do homework because of "family time." When I called home to confirm this at 3:30, Mom yelled at me that I was "intruding on family time!"
09/24/09 - KH
One of my (recent) favorites was "I didn't do my homework because my mom was getting her hair cut." Still trying to figure that one out!
09/24/09 - Marilyn Cahill
I suggest we all read a book called "The Case Against Homework."
09/24/09 - cr
one of my student told me he could not hand the homework on time because the mother has not finish it.
09/24/09 - jmh
I was driving across the country over winter break back to Utah and our car was broken into overnight. I had to explain to my students that their math tests were actually stolen and were somewhere in Nebraska.
09/24/09 - c. johnston
i always tell my kids that if the dog eats i want to see proof (joking of course) well one day a boy uses th excuse and then says i have proof in my backpack. he produces a plastic zip top bag with.......a chewed up math page. thank goodness that was all he brought in.
09/24/09 - ml
I just got home today and my dpuppy ate the book that my daughter was to write her paper, unable to turn in the paper on time. nedd to get a new book
09/24/09 - Rhonda
A father called me and requested an extension for his daughter, a senior in high school. He told me I ws putting too much pressure on her, she has anxiety issues and couldn't finish on time because of prom.
09/24/09 - LisaLou
I also had a puppy who chewed up dozens of my students' math tests when I took them home to correct! I believe that one!
09/24/09 - 09/24/09 g adams
One of students gave me a great (but true excuse):"The maid threw my homework away. I left it on my bed and when she cleaned she threw it in the garbage!"
09/24/09 - PB
Unfortunately some are not humorous, but sad. The saddest one I even received was that the fourth grade boy could not do his homework because the police raided his house and arrested his parents for selling drugs. Since it was a samll community, unfortunately, everyone knew it was true.
09/24/09 - bobbie
I couldn't do my homework as I was under the doctor!
09/24/09 - Belinda
I liked the one who said his mom already started to grade it and he had already turned it in
09/24/09 - astoecken
I had a student tell me that they left their homework at home, because their mom was going to start to grade it. Also had a student tell me that their homework was in their moms car and they would not be able to get it until the weekend because her car broke down on the way to school. The best part of it all is that the student had turned the paper in the day before.
09/24/09 - pcowan
........ I thought you were joking about homework......
09/24/09 - maureen k
i once had a child come in with a math paper that had burnt edges. the note explained that milk had been spilt on the homework, so they put it in the microwave to dry it off, but instead it caught fire!
09/24/09 - jkcook
All packed hits to close to home for us. Living on a military base with kids constantly coming and going we here that one fairly often. I know it's only too easy. We had to mail library books back to Colorado when they got shipped to Japan on one move!
